


Cold Blooded

by hotchoco195



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Jossverse
Genre: Angelus' mindfuckery, Angst, F/M, First Time, Giles always gets knocked unconscious, Porn Without (much) Plot, Season 2, Very dubious con
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-07
Updated: 2013-03-07
Packaged: 2017-12-04 14:11:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,568
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/711609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hotchoco195/pseuds/hotchoco195
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Willow gets kidnapped, but can Buffy pay the price to get her back?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cold Blooded

 

“Thanks Cordy. See you tomorrow?”

“Sure. Night Willow.”

The redhead shut the car door and headed up the front path, fumbling in her backpack for her keys. She clucked her tongue as the cold metal slipped from her fingers, waving as Cordelia pulled off. She crouched to retrieve her keys and stood again, gasping at the figure suddenly standing before her.

“Hey Will. Late night at the library?”

She let out a half-whimper, the breath rushing from her lungs as Angelus smirked and tilted his head to consider her.

“Wha-wha-what-”

“What am I doing here? What do I want? Relax, I’m not here to kill ya. I just need to borrow you for a while.”

“Borrow me?” Willow shook.

Angelus flexed his fist. “Sure. You won’t even notice.”

 

Buffy was staring at the ceiling, trying unsuccessfully to sleep. _Another patrol without seeing Angel. No - you have to stop thinking of him that way. Angelus_. Her mom was away, and she figured she might as well get up and put a movie on, hopefully pass out on the couch. The blonde trudged downstairs just as the phone rang.  _What the fuck? It’s 2am_. She changed course for the kitchen and answered.

“Hello?”

“Hey Buff. Hope I didn’t wake you.”

The cold chuckle brushed any fatigue from her bones in an instant. “What do you want?”

“To see you, lover.”

“Never gonna happen.”

“Aw, that’s a shame. Cos Willow here was just saying she’s dying to talk to you.”

“Wha-what? Willow?” Buffy almost dropped the phone.

“Yeah. Want me to put her on?”

There was a silence and then thick, frightened words reached her. “Buffy?”

“Oh my god Will! Are you okay?”

Willow didn’t answer, just cried quietly.

“Will!”

“I’m fine Buffy, just…don’t-”

Someone cut her off and Angelus spoke again. “We’re having a little picnic and were just wondering if you wanted to join.”

“If you hurt her I swear-”

“Save the heroics for someone who cares, Buff. We’re at the old warehouse if you wanna stop by, and I do mean just you.”

She hung up without answering and immediately dialled Giles’ number.

“Hello?”

“Giles, it’s me.”

“Buffy? It’s late, are you alright?”

“Angelus has Willow.”

“Good Lord.” It was a husky mumble and she could almost hear Giles freezing in place.

“Can you give me a ride?”

“Buffy, surely this is a trap.”

“Well obviously, but what do you want me to do? It’s Willow, Giles!”

“Yes, yes, but maybe we should gather some support. Wake the others-”

“No. He said just me and I’m not putting Willow any more at risk than I already am bringing you.”

“Very well. I’ll be there in ten minutes.”

*****

The factory hadn’t been completely burned out during Giles’ vengeance tear. The outer walls looked untouched. Giles parked up the block and glanced at her.

“I shall be here if you need me.”

“It’s probably going to get messy.”

“You’re matched Angelus before. I have no fear you can do it again.”

She met his grim look and nodded. Buffy strode confidently straight for the factory doors, figuring whatever Angelus had planned was not going to be a subtle ambush. She entered without knocking and headed into the wide open space. Here there was more damage, the long table in charred ruins. Angelus sat on one rescued chair, Willow perched on his lap and visibly shaking as he reached a hand up and stroked her hair. Surprisingly, Spike sat in his wheelchair beside them. Less shocking was the crowd of minions surrounding the trio.

“Hey Buff. Good of you to come.”

“Let her go.”

Spike snorted. “Yeah Slayer, cos that always works so well.”

“Buffy, get out of here!” Willow cried.

She squeaked as Angelus tightened his hand on her shoulder. Buffy could feel her blood rising as she met Angelus’ contempt-dripping smirk.

“I don’t wanna do this the hard way, Buff. How about you put down all those stakes you’re packing?”

She paused but Willow’s bright wide eyes convinced her. She tossed the wood to the floor with a hollow echo.

“Let her go. You got me here, that’s what you wanted isn’t it?”

“But it’s not the whole story, lover,” Angelus stood, thrusting Willow onto Spike’s lap, “Walk with me.”

 

That was not what Buffy expected but she obeyed, trailing Angelus on a wide loop around the open factory floor.

“See I want something else from you Slayer. And if you don’t play along Willow there gets to take your place.”

“If you touch her I’ll kill you.”

“I’ve heard _that_ before.” He spun to face her, using his height to loom over Buffy.

“Things have changed.”

“Yes they have. Shall we cut to the chase? You’re going to fuck me lover.”

She practically spat as she recoiled from him. “What? You kidnap one of my best friends for a booty call?”

“Call it a whim, but I thought it might be fun to destroy you a little bit more.”

“And you picked rape to do it? Wow, bit amateur for you isn’t it?”

He just smiled. “But it won’t be rape, Buff. You were all hot and moist for this body once, and you still are. You know I’ve got the experience to make you enjoy it. But if you refuse, then I’ll take Willow instead – and it will not be anywhere near as pleasant.”

“Why do you want this? You hate me!” she asked, genuinely confused.

“Just makes it sweeter, precious.” He reached out a thumb to touch her cheek and she shuddered away.

“This is ridiculous.”

“Perhaps, but either way it’s happening. Choosing time Buff – you or Willow? Maybe I’ll even let the minions have a go with her after I’m done.”

The teenager’s mind raced but she didn’t see a way out. Willow was surrounded by vamps who could drain her the second Buffy raised a hand to Angelus. Giles was outside, but what could he do without causing the same reaction? And over it all, beating behind her eyes like a prayer, was the stubborn fact that this was all her fault. She hadn’t killed Angelus and he’d murdered Jenny, taken Willow. She wasn’t going to let the redhead suffer one second more for her sake.

“I’ll do it.”

“Excellent! I didn’t think you’d take much convincing. Funny though, how sleeping with you was what made me the man I am today, and now it’s going to save your little friend.”

“Can we just do this?” she demanded, trying not to cry or vomit from rage.

“Eager – I like that in a woman.”

He turned and headed downstairs to the basement bedrooms but stopped when he realised Buffy wasn’t following him.

“Problem?”

“What about Willow? How do I know she’ll be safe?”

“She’s with Spike. He couldn’t touch her even if he wanted to.”

“And the rest?”

Angelus sighed but he could see the determination in her eyes. “Oh William? If I don’t come back up in one piece, kill Willow. Otherwise make sure our guest is unmolested.”

“With pleasure.” The other vamp called back.

“Good enough?”

She just swept past him, heading down the stairs.

*****

It was Spike and Drusilla’s room – she could tell from the smashed dolls on the dresser. The air was thick with old smoke but nothing looked burnt. She wrapped her hands over her chest defensively as Angelus shut the door, whistling jauntily.

“Do you have to?”

“No.” he smirked.

She wasn’t entirely sure how to do this or what he wanted, but she figured getting through it quickly was better for everyone. She stripped off her jacket and flung it aside, starting to pull her shirt over her head.

“Whoa! Hasty, lover? It won’t be much fun that way.”

“Like I give a shit.” She snapped.

“You should. I’ll get off no matter what.” Angelus shrugged as he came closer.

Big arms wrapped around her waist as he leaned down and kissed her, lips softer than she’d expected. He stroked her back soothingly as his tongue touched patiently, waiting for her to open her mouth and let him in. It was so reminiscent of Angel that she almost sobbed. _You could do this. You could just let him be tender and pretend none of this ever happened. It would be easy._ But the thought repulsed her and she pushed at his chest.

“Don’t do this. Don’t try to be him, please.”

“I’m just making it special for you, lover.” He said, lips twitching with a barely-contained smile.

“I don’t want it. Be the animal you are.”

“If that’s what you want.”

He crushed her against him, tongue pillaging her mouth. She wrapped her hands around his neck and threw herself into it desperately. She practically shredded his sweater as she dragged it off him, nails scratching down his chest. If she seemed passionate, it was an unconscious response, an attempt to fight him even in defeat. Her mind remained detached and horrified but her body opened up to him. Angelus lifted her and threw her on the bed, unfastening his pants as he kicked off his shoes. The linen pooled on the floor and he crawled over her, mouth flattening Buffy’s for another kiss that made her feel like she couldn’t breathe. With a hot flush of shame she realised she _was_ still attracted to his body, and she shut her eyes quickly.

“Uh uh, Buff, you don’t get out of it that easy.”

He peeled off her colourful jeans. Her bra followed, and he tore into the soft flesh of her breasts with human teeth. The pain was just soft enough to turn into something nicer as his tongue flicked over the nipple and she arched up with a moan. Her underwear was disposed of with no ceremony and then his head was between her thighs, product- stiffened hair tickling her legs as he devoured her. Buffy couldn’t think of a more accurate word for the way he was using everything against her – lips, tongue, teeth – attacking her soft folds like a starving man at a buffet. His tongue darted into her entrance, cold and quickly slickened by the moisture seeping unwanted from her core. There was pressure growing in her toes, creeping up her legs as a finger pushed inside her roughly. He fucked her, tongue glossing over her clit, always teetering on the brink of too rough. To her great humiliation she loved it, being handled like she wouldn’t break. Something inside her answered with a snarl and she threw her head back, clinging to the headboard as she thrust her hips up at him, desperate for more.

 

Willow had panicked the second she saw Buffy enter the factory, heart racing. What was Angelus going to do to her? How could Willow be so stupid as to let herself get caught and used against the Slayer? She was a bad friend. Her own fear was pushed away as she focused on trying to hear what Angelus and Buffy were talking about. Then they’d gone downstairs together and she could have screamed at the not-knowing.

“It’s all my fault.” She didn’t even realise she said it out loud.

“Cheer up, Red. If we’re all lucky, Angelus will satisfy himself in half the usual time and you’ll be home by dawn, safe and snug in your bed.”

“Satisfy?” she frowned, “How?”

Spike looked almost disgusted. “Him and the Slayer. Making the beast with two backs. You know, shagging-”

“I know what it means.” She cut him off and he looked taken aback, even mildly impressed.

“Yeah. Well for some strange reason Peaches decided that was the next great way to get under her skin, so they’re down there - desecrating my bed, mind you – and then you both get to skip off home.”

“That’s horrible!” Willow gaped.

“Trust me, pet. With Angelus that’s getting off easy. He could have insisted you play guest star.”

She shivered, inadvertently pushing herself closer to the vamp. His hands were lying on the chair’s rests, relaxed, but she knew if she even put a foot on the floor he could have his fangs in her neck before the other leg shifted. She tried to stay calm, reasoning that there was nothing she could do now but wait.

 

Buffy was going to pieces fighting herself. She needed to come – wanted it, even – but some part of her rebelled and tried to keep what Angelus wanted from him, damn the consequences. _Willow_. The redhead’s scared face flashed in her mind and she relented. She wouldn’t give Angelus any cause to turn his attentions to her friend. One hand slithered down to clutch at the back of Angelus’ head, thighs quivering under his hold. He flicked his tongue over her clit and she came with a shriek that must have been audible upstairs, but couldn’t find it in her to care. She couldn’t do anything in fact but clench her eyes shut and scream, her whole body rolling on the mattress. Eventually the throbbing of her muscles faded and she settled back, gasping for breath.

“Phew! Maybe I’ll give you a minute to recover before we move on.”

She couldn’t answer, just laid the back of her hands over her eyes and tried to forget everything.

*****

Willow had been waiting for so long she’d almost forgotten who she was sitting on, resting against Spike as she got too tired to hold herself up. She even answered a few of his questions, nothing too prying, just innocent stuff about music and movies. They were debating the merits of Shirley Bassey versus Ella Fitzgerald when a couple of minions came from the back of the factory, dragging someone between them.

“Found him snooping around outside. What should we do with him?”

Willow gasped as Giles lifted his head, looking dazed. Spike grinned.

“Well, well. Evenin’ Watcher.”

“Willow…Buffy?” Giles frowned.

“Oh she’s fine. Angelus is keeping her right busy. Worry about yourself mate.”

“What are you going to do with him?” Willow whispered.

“Kill him, obviously. What should I do?”

“No! Please, don’t.” she pawed at his shoulder.

“And what alternative do you suggest?” Spike regarded her.

“You said Buffy and I were going to be let go after…why can’t you just let Giles go too?”

“Cos he’s a danger. Trespassing, creeping about late at night. I mean I’m incapacitated, as such,” he waved at his legs, “So I can’t keep an eye on both of you.”

“The minons-”

“Those good-for-nothings would only get staked by an experienced hunter such as this. Nope, he has to go.”

She grabbed his arm, eyes pleading. “No, there must be something. Please Spike, please don’t hurt him. I’ll do whatever you want.”

He seemed more interested now. “Anything?”

“Well, yeah.” She wiped her nose with a sniff.

“Like what Buffy’s doing for Angelus?”

She hesitated. “But…I mean, the chair.”

“Some of my bits are still working love, and it’s been a long time since anyone remembered that.”

She drew a shuddering breath. “I’ve never done that before.”

“I know. Can smell it all over you. That’s what makes it intriguing.”

She glanced at Giles, unsure how much of the conversation he was getting. He’d obviously taken a bump to the head but his eyes seemed clearer now.

“I’ll do it. But not like this.”

“How do you propose then, Red?”

“I don’t want an audience.” She nodded towards the loitering vamps, some licking their lips.

“Fair enough. But the old man stays where I can see him.”

She glanced around and spotted the cage high above the floor. “There.”

“Willow, what are you doing?” Gile objected.

Spike snapped his fingers and one of the sentries holding Giles knocked his head again. The man went limp, but Willow was secretly grateful. She didn’t need him to see or hear this. Giles was dragged over and manhandled into the cage, and it was raised back to its place in the rafters. Spike snapped again.

“Everyone out. Go patrol the perimeter.”

They filed out disgruntledly, looking back at him and muttering. The doors banged shut and Spike turned to look at her.

“Well pet. Where should we start?”

 

“You know, you’re really quite charming all covered in sweat, your face pink, the hair messy. I should have done this sooner.”

Angelus’ words made her want to crawl away and die but Buffy turned to face him tight-lipped. The vampire was leaning on his hand watching her with delight.

“I should have killed you the first moment I knew what you were.”

“A vampire, or soulless?”

She didn’t answer. His hand trailed over her stomach, smearing her own juices in a ring around her belly button. She shrank away from the teasing gesture.

“Let’s get on with it.”

“Good, because after that performance I’m about to burst.”

He moved back over her and leaned down to bite her neck, licking the salty sweat from her as he nipped her collar bones and shoulders. She could feel him achingly hard against her thigh, and spread her legs wider. Angelus reached down and guided himself into her, watching her face carefully. There was no way it wasn’t going to hurt – she was practically a virgin after all. Buffy grimaced but lay there quietly, grateful for the brief respite he gave her to adjust.

“Ready Buff?”

She clenched her jaw. “Yes.”

It was like a rodeo bull at the gate. Angelus pounded into her, squeezing her hips as he lifted her off the bed and thrust. Buffy struggled to get a grip on his upper arms and steady herself, vision blurring with his viciousness. But it only made it hotter, the undisguised fight for control. She flung herself up at him, determined to end up on top.

 

“Kneel, pet.”

Willow swallowed and stood slowly, placing herself between Spike’s legs.

“I don’t think I have to make any threats to get your best behaviour, do I?”

Willow shook her head and he smiled, leaning forward to kiss her because she was just so cute. It only lasted a second but he could tell it threw her off balance.

“Kneel.”

The redhead awkwardly lowered herself as he unbuttoned his jeans. She looked so uncertain that he took pity and reached in, drawing out his cock that was already semi-hard from her wiggling in his lap the last half hour.

“Angel tells me you’re a quick study, love. You can do this.”

She leaned in tentatively, closing her hand around his prick. Her eyes widened.

“It’s warm.”

“Not what you were expecting?”

“W-w-well I haven’t been with a boy, and then you know, vampire, so it’s all kinda new.”

She gave an experimental swipe and Spike hissed, trying to arch up and failing thanks to his useless legs. Willow was curious now, the part of her brain that got her into the most trouble taking over from the half that was freaked out and wanted to cry for a week. She tugged again and Spike clicked his tongue encouragingly.

“Don’t be a tease, Red. Give it a lick.”

She bent forward and slowly touched her tongue to the tip. It was musky, unfamiliar but warm. She closed her mouth over the end and sucked.

“Christ! Do that again.”

Ignoring the librarian hanging in a cage ten feet away, ignoring the image of her best friend generating a whole bunch of new self-loathing downstairs, Willow repeated the motion. Spike’s appreciative moan made her bolder and she sped up. This was new and sort of fascinating, and more than enough to distract her. She latched onto it willingly, using her hand on the strange pink appendage’s base and flicking her tongue across the top.

“Oh God, you’ve got to stop love or I’m gonna blow my wad like a horny teenager.”

She looked up at him askance, but even though he’d said to stop Spike’s hand pushed her head back towards his crotch. She sucked some more, cheeks hollowing as she bobbed, and before another minute she was choking on a mouthful of something salty and tepid as Spike threatened to rip half her hair out.

“Jeeeeesus, Red. You almost killed me.”

“Really?” she sort of doubted that pathetic blow job had worked so quickly. It must have been the months since anyone touched Spike but himself.

“Come here.” He patted his knee and she climbed back up, straddling him.

He kissed her again, hand clutching at her breast softly, stroking the sensitive skin. She gasped and shifted in his lap, brushing his penis. A glance told her it was gradually hardening again.

“Take off those silly tights.”

She complied, even though she had to get off his lap to wrestle the fluoro pink from her legs. She frowned at him and he nodded, and her underwear went too.

“Beautiful. Come back here.”

Spike’s lips massaged her throat as his fingers danced up under her skirt. Willow had to grip his shoulder to keep her balance as the clever digits swept over her clit. She had to admit he seemed good at this.

“Like that? See, Spike can be nice too.”

 

Buffy was covered in scratches and bruises, her hair tangled beyond repair, her muscles starting to ache, and still she just grit her teeth and rocked under Angelus. He was grunting, thrusting as if he was going to cleave her in two. She cried out as he bit her chest and raked her nails down his back, tightening her legs around him. It was coming now, her release so close she could taste it bitter in her mouth, and with the overwhelming thought that it was almost over she came with a shudder. But Angelus wasn’t finished, and his only response was to pull out and flip her over. She’d barely opened her eyes when he slid into her from behind, the new angle affecting her already-sensitive flesh in painfully good ways. He gripped the back of her neck and loomed over her, broad chest weighing down her back as his hips pumped relentlessly and he drove her face down into the sheets. This was the animal she’d asked for, the complete opposite of Angel, and he’d still made her come twice. She was horrible; _she_ was the real monster.

Angelus was everywhere, stuck to her skin in ways she knew could never be undone, invading her mind as much as her body. He slid a hand over her stomach and down to tweak her clit and she pushed back against him, the pressure swelling inside her again. He sped up, chanting her name in a mockery of affection and suddenly clamped his fingers on her clit as he slid his fangs into her shoulder. Buffy screamed, coming harder than ever. She felt like her whole body was melting away as Angelus possessed her totally, brutally. He emptied himself into her, lapping at the bite lazily. After what felt like eternity, after a moment of time she could never take back, he pulled out and dropped her to the bed cruelly, falling beside Buffy licking the bright red from his lips.

“That wasn’t part of the deal!” she yelled, too exhausted to actually do anything about it.

“No, but you loved it.” He laughed.

Her eyes blazed. Buffy leapt off the bed despite her body’s protests and grabbed her pants, forcing them back up her legs.

“Going so soon?”

“I assume that’s the end of our bargain. You got what you wanted.”

“I did, didn’t I?” he smirked dreamily, “I suppose you can have Willow back. But feel free to stop by if you start to crave that feeling again, Buff.”

“What feeling? Utter loathing?”

He was off the bed so fast she didn’t see it, one hand on her ass and the other on the back of her head as he tugged her to him.

“That feeling like the whole world stops mattering and there’s nothing outside this room, no demons and no responsibilities and you could die happily, broken open.”

“Dream on,” she fought him, “You weren’t that good.”

“Lie all you like if it makes you feel better, but I saw you. I felt you, lover. You want oblivion, and only I can give that to you.”

She pulled her shirt on and flipped her hair, searching for the rest of her clothes without deigning to respond. But her mind was already feeling a sinking dread that maybe, just maybe, he was right.

 

Willow wasn’t sure what she was supposed to be feeling, but turned on wouldn’t have made the list in her wildest imaginings. Yet Spike’s persistent fingers gliding over her folds and slipping into her before drifting away again was torturously good.

“Ready love?”

She was breathing hard, bracing herself on his chest. “I-I-I think so.”

He lifted her ass and lowered her slowly onto his cock, squeezing gently as she bit her lip in pain. She was so tight he thought he might come again already, the faint scent of her blood as he breached her tipping him towards the edge. But Spike pulled it together and waited, regaining his control. Eventually Willow stopped being so rigid and he patted her bum.

“You’re gonna have to steer, Red. I can’t do much in the way of wriggling.”

She nodded and pushed herself down onto his shaft. It was uncomfortable, but she knew that couldn’t last too long. She set up a slow rhythm, letting herself get used to Spike as he gripped the arms of the chair tight enough to crack the plastic. On impulse she darted forward and kissed him, and moaned at the sudden change in angle.

“Better pet?”

“Yes.”

She rode him harder then, speeding up as the sensations in her core changed to something thick, something delicious. She wanted more and she sped up, knocking the chair back against the table as Spike captured her lips and explored her mouth, his tongue cool and enthralling. She ground down against him, keeping up the angle as he started to pant unnaturally. Willow felt feverish, her limbs shaking. But her body took over and kept up the pace when she thought she would falter, riding him until something inside her snapped and she wailed, clawing at his chest. Spike groaned.

“Oh don’t stop now love, don’t stop.”

She realised she had automatically slowed down and forced her tired thighs to lift her up again, plunging down on Spike a few more times before the vampire’s eyes rolled back in his head and he howled.

“Fuck me! Aw Red, you are like a breath of heaven.”

She ignored the endearment, her post-climax haze melting away. She started to realise she was still sitting on Spike and wriggled, suddenly uncomfortable. Willow stood and retrieved her underwear, feeling the warm trickle of Spike’s seed on her thighs as she pulled them up and reached for her tights.

“That was right fun, pet. A memorable first.”

She closed her eyes and inhaled. Spike was her first. How the hell did that happen? How did she feel about it?

“Hey now, don’t overthink it. You did a noble thing, saved your old man, helped me out. You had fun, didn’t you?”

“Well…it felt good.” Willow admitted.

“Then that’s all you need to know. I’m not Angelus – not likely to start haunting your bedroom window. We just had a bit of fun, s’all.”

 

She attempted a smile and he grinned. A moment later Buffy appeared at the top of the stairs, stalking towards her.

“Willow? Are you okay?”

“Fine, Buffy.” She turned, noticing Spike hurriedly draw his coat over his still unbuttoned pants and the limp cock hanging over the waistband.

“Is that Giles?” the blonde gaped up at the cage.

“Yeah, old Rupes tried to crash the party. We thought it best to keep him unconscious so he didn’t hear any of that moaning you were doing.”

She scowled at him and walked over to the chain, lowering the cage slowly.

“Will, can you help?”

“Oh, sure.” Willow ran over, casting an uncertain glance back at Spike.

They opened the cage and dragged Giles out, draping him over Buffy’s shoulder.

“Are you alright?” Willow asked softly.

Buffy paused. “Maybe. Maybe never again. But that’s what Angelus wanted, after all.”

“Tooroo then.” Spike waved, lighting a cigarette.

“Come on, before Angel changes his mind.”

They got Giles outside and found the curious minions waiting, but no one tried to stop them as they carried him to the car. Buffy laid him in the backseat with a sigh.

“How long’s he been out?”

“Awhile. I think they hit him pretty hard.”

“I’ll drive. I just wanna go home and wash tonight off me.”

“Buffy, I’m so sorry-”

“Don’t, Will. It’s not your fault. Angelus knew he could use you to make me do anything, and there was no way I was going to let him hurt you. Tonight was pretty awful, but I can live with it. I couldn’t have lived if it was you instead.”

Willow blushed. There was no way she could ever tell Buffy about her and Spike now. It would make the Slayer’s sacrifice almost worthless. But she knew there was no comparison between sleeping with Spike and sleeping with Angelus. Spike had been patient and kind and good, whereas Angelus would have made her scream just to get to Buffy. As they got in the front she decided she had to say it now or she never would, and then it was something Spike or Angelus could use to hurt Buffy later.

“I didn’t tell you the whole story about Giles. Spike was going to kill him straight away but I convinced him not to.”

“How?” Buffy didn’t sound suspicious, only amazed.

“I slept with him.”

The car jerked and Willow grabbed at the dashboard, but Buffy got it back under control. Neither of them spoke for a while.

“Buffy?”

The Slayer took a shaky breath “It’s okay, Will. I can’t exactly be mad at you for saving Giles. And fuck, God knows what I did back there was much worse.”

She laughed for a moment. “The whole situation was my fault anyway. I’m so sorry Will.”

“It wasn’t that bad, with Spike, and I wanted to keep Giles safe for you. Really Buffy, I’m not upset about it. A little in shock maybe.”

“I hate myself. He got to me, Will. He did exactly what he said he would.”

Her shoulders slumped and she started to cry, fat tears streaming down her face.

“Oh Buffy. This is so messed up. Come on, let’s get you home.”

Buffy just nodded, watching the road as she wept. She headed for Giles’ house, thinking they could get the Watcher in bed and both shower, then crash on the couch. _God knows we’ve earned a day off school. And then tomorrow I’ll kill Angelus._

“Almost there, Buffy. I guess this is gonna be our little secret?” Willow glanced at the backseat.

“You planning to share it with Xander?”

“Hell no.”

“I’ll have to tell Giles something to get him off my back, but I can’t say this. This is too awful.”

“Alright.”

*****

Angelus was hunting in the park when the minion found him.

“Sire, the Slayer has returned to the factory.”

The master vamp dropped his current meal half-eaten and grinned like a wolf in the night.

“Excellent work. Finish him up if you like.”

The minion fell on the groaning victim hungrily and Angelus had to stop himself from running. He’d known the other night was only going to make things more interesting.

 

Buffy was waiting in a chair by the table when he arrived. “Hello lover.”

“Hey Buff. Miss me already?”

“You know, your forehead might actually be as big as your ego.”

“And yet here you are.” He sauntered towards her.

She looked down at her hands gloomily. “Yes.”

“Back for more?”

The stake that hit him in the thigh begged to differ. He swore and stumbled.

“Bitch!”

“See, I haven’t really decided. You’re right Angelus, I do want you again. I want you to take me to the brink, to fill me with danger and passion and anger and know that I’m always this close to death. But that’s selfish. And being selfish about you got us into this mess. It got Miss Calendar killed, and Willow…I can’t let you hurt anyone else just to get my jollies.”

“You can’t kill me!” he laughed, “It’s not just Soulboy you need now. It’s me too.”

Her face fell and he ripped the stake out of his leg, throwing it aside. In a second he had her by the throat, dragging her onto the table.

“I’m gonna make you pay for that, lover, and then I’m gonna make you come so hard you forget your own name.”

“Please. I want it.”

“I know, baby, I know.” He undid his belt with his free hand.

He didn’t see where her stake came from: probably the sleeve, maybe her boot. He just stared down at the blistering hot wood in his chest.

“Thank you.” She whispered as he felt himself crumbling.

There was a rush of dust, nothing she hadn’t seen a hundred times, but this felt as right as the first time. Buffy lay on the table with her tormentor’s ashes sticking to her clothes. There was no way back from this.


End file.
